Trust in God for your Recovery - Step 3

Step 3 - Made a decision to turn our will and our lives to the care of God as we understood him.
(Adapted from the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous)

‘Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.’ [the words of Jesus] - Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV)

If we are practicing 12-step recovery principles, Step 3 is the point at which we make a decision to follow and to trust God. Those who have not yet come to believe in God may decide to trust that their recovery community and program are the things that they need to follow and place their trust in, at least in that phase of their lives. Some may have ideals and philosophical convictions that they trust will help them to set boundaries and inspire new life choices, drawing them further away from addiction. If these communities, programs, and ideals are sufficiently strong, they can indeed help people to gain years of sobriety.

A Fresh Decision Made on a New Basis

As Christians, this Step can at first glance look like something we have already done and are doing - even if we are still in active addiction. It sounds a lot like what happens at the point of conversion, the moment when someone gives their life to Christ. And it is, but the first thing to remember is that we are making this decision on a new basis and in relation to our recovery.

What is this new basis? In Step 1, we have admitted that we are powerless over our addictive substance (alcohol/drugs) - so we absolutely cannot use it successfully or safely anymore. At another level, we have found we’re unable on our own strength and ideas to prevent relapse long-term. Our lives are unmanageable (or broken) as a result of our addiction but another kind of unmanageability (emotional/psychological brokenness), however subtle, causes us to relapse. We are defeated. We need a new way to live and more power and strength than we can muster ourselves.

In Step 2 (discussed in an earlier blog), as Christians, we open our minds to see that this power, strength, and, indeed, way of life are available to us in Christ. We reconnect our hearts and minds to the truth that our God can and will restore us and more if we make it our business to abide in Him.

So we re-approach Step 3 knowing that this is urgent. We are not just “inviting Jesus into our hearts” and hoping for the best. The decision we are making will be the basis of daily decisions to seek the will of God, to not act on impulse or appetite anymore but to stop and seek God in prayer, knowing that he will give us the wisdom and the strength to do the right thing and, crucially, not succumb to the temptations we shall surely face on the road out of addiction.

To Abide and Obey

Jesus tells us that he is the truth, the way and the life (John 14:6) and therefore to abide in him (John 15:4). He also says: “I am the vine, you are the branches. Those who abide in me and I in them bear much fruit because apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5. We know that with Jesus, we can be more than conquerors of our addiction. But how do we abide? If we love and trust in the power and wisdom of Jesus, he says something very succinct and challenging: “If you love me, keep my commands.” John 14:15

We really need to be prepared to follow Jesus, not just ask him for things. That is where we will see a miraculous change in our lives and a new-found power to conquer addiction and all of its surrounding struggles. In moments of temptation or other challenges, we turn to God not just for help and comfort but for wisdom, direction, and grace to be able to do the right thing in the moment.

The Care of God

In amongst all this talk of difficult decisions and obedience, let’s not forget what we’re actually doing. We are deciding to place our wills and our lives in his care. Because he absolutely loves and cares for his children.

Our best efforts and ideas haven’t rescued us from addiction. Our greatest anxieties haven’t served us very well either. In the knowledge that our wills often lead us down the wrong path, that we often know our desires and attitudes aren’t quite right but don’t know how to shut them up, we can go to our Father in heaven and ask him to help us - to care for and quieten our wills. In turning our lives over to his care, something amazing happens.

We can often succumb to temptation or just faulty decisions because we fear doing the right thing. What will happen if we don’t get the comfort we were seeking in drink/drugs/sex/greed? What will happen if I admit my mistakes and vulnerabilities? How will I lose out if I follow God and give of myself? How will I ever build the life that I want in sobriety?

In Step 3, we make the decision to stay close to God moment-by-moment, always seeking to do the “next right thing” and trusting that God will take care of the outcome. When we do that, amazing things start to happen and the power and courage that we need in recovery become ever more tangible.

“...God as we understood him.’

The last part of that Step can seem a bit off-key for us Christians. We believe in the God of the Bible. Any “understanding” beyond that could take us into unhelpful territory. But actually, we each need to have an authentic understanding of God based on what the Bible teaches us, our Christian community and, crucially, our own time spent with him-praying, listening, following, and reading His word. From that, we will gain a unique relationship and understanding, just as one does spending time with any other person.

So, as Christians, let’s see this last part as a call to an authentic, first-hand relationship with God and not to precarious theology!

Conclusion

Nobody apart from Jesus has managed to surrender perfectly to God. We might make mistakes and subtly take our wills back along the way but if we make the sincere decision to follow God and reset our intentions daily, seeking his grace, we will have a sure foundation for our recovery. Taken with Steps 1 and 2, we are kept safe from relapse into addiction, so long as we are willing and ready to carry on working through the spiritual disciplines contained in the 12 Steps.

Questions to consider:

• Do I trust God to care for me and my life in recovery?

• Are there areas of my life that I fear surrendering my will to God in? Why?

• What would my hopes be in taking this Step 3?

• Am I ready to make a fresh decision to depend upon and follow God?

• Consider the original Step 3 prayer from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous,  “God, I offer myself to Thee — to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!”

What does this prayer mean to you? How would you pray it in your own words?

Prayer

LORD, thank you for seeing us so deeply in every aspect of our lives. Thank you for telling us and showing us how to live, how to abide in your kingdom and be truly free. Please remove any unbelief we may have about your love and commitment towards us and help us to trust in your ways. Help us to choose you and to choose life and help us to reject the deceptive temptations that come our way. Please bless us in our journey towards ever closer relationship with you, in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Some more scriptures to connect with Step 3:

Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. - Psalm 37:4-5

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. - Proverbs 3:5-6